From: William Manning
To: Jim Yourke
Date: Tue, Jun 16, 2009 at 6:28 AM
Subject: Yu-Gi-Oh Cards
Mr./Ms. Yu-Gi-Oh,
My name is William, and I live on 162nd and Grant, so around your area. I heard about your offer through a friend of mine, who is an avid collector. I am rather new to this specific field of cards, but am no novice when it comes to collecting. I am willing to trade you well over $400 worth of vintage NASCAR trading cards for your collection of 1,200 cards. I had my friend, Seamus, appraise the list for me, and I am impressed. I believe that this is just what I need to jump start my Yu-Gi-Oh collection! If you are interested, I have listings of all my cards and their respective pricings.
William
From: Jim Yourke
To: William Manning
Date: Tue, Jun 16, 2009 at 8:37 AM
Subject: Re: Yu-Gi-Oh Cards
Let me know what else u got???
From: William Manning
To: Jim Yourke
Date: Tue, Jun 16, 2009 at 2:57 PM
Subject: Re: Yu-Gi-Oh Cards
Good sir, one question mark will suffice. I recognize a sentence ending with a question mark as a question. Three make me uncomfortable, as it is too asymmetrical. Anyhow, to trading... My cousin-in-law Joseph just moved out of his parents' house into an apartment, and had to give up his pets. I received his marmot, Steve, who cost Joseph a good $350. He is a good pet who makes very little noise, and doesn't chew on anything other than my used socks. I think he likes the smell. I recently bathed him and trimmed his unruly pelt, so I'm assuming his monetary value has at least risen $30. You may feel free to sell him or keep him as your own.
From: Jim Yourke
To: William Manning
Date: Tue, Jun 16, 2009 at 3:23 PM
Subject: Re: Yu-Gi-Oh Cards
So what dose he comes with
From: William Manning
To: Jim Yourke
Date: Tue, Jun 16, 2009 at 3:35 PM
Subject: Re: Yu-Gi-Oh Cards
Steve comes with all the accouterments common to marmots. I have inherited (and am willing to give you) an over-sized hamster ball typically used for ferrets. I have a large terrarium for him, but that is mostly for him to sleep in. He doesn't enjoy being cooped up for more than six or seven hours a day. I also have a 30-lb bag of bedding for him, which should last a good 18 months. He eats melon rinds and miscellaneous vegetables. You can just give him leftovers (as long as it's not meat), and he will love you forever. I also have a 250 page marmot instruction manual, and an extensive collection of marmot toys.
From: Jim Yourke
To: William Manning
Date: Tue, Jun 16, 2009 at 3:44 PM
Subject: Re: Yu-Gi-Oh Cards
U said u had other stuff can u tell me of all the things u have to trade. because i like the the offer but I don't know if my wife is going to like it I have too talk to her when she gets home.but let me know what else u got
From: William Manning
To: Jim Yourke
Date: Tue, Jun 16, 2009 at 4:05 PM
Subject: Re: Yu-Gi-Oh Cards
Well, in the same vein of pets, I have a cobalt blue tarantula from Myanmar. Her name is Nargis (after the cyclone that hit Myanmar), and she is a gorgeous shade of cobalt. When I first got her, she was rather timid and spent most of her time in her burrow. However, after some prodding and tempting with dead mice, she came out of her hole and since then, she has been a lovely out-of-the-house critter. She eats primarily mice, but it is possible to feed her crickets and raw meat. From time to time, she will jump repeatedly at the sides of the terrarium, but this is just her way of showing affection. I would not advise putting any body part near her.
I still have many options available.
William
From: Jim Yourke
To: William Manning
Date: Tue, Jun 16, 2009 at 4:09 PM
Subject: Re: Yu-Gi-Oh Cards
Sorry tarantula is a no my wife will kill me what else u got.
From: William Manning
To: Jim Yourke
Date: Tue, Jun 16, 2009 at 4:22 PM
Subject: Re: Yu-Gi-Oh Cards
Are you sure you don't want the tarantula? It is absolutely beautiful, and has an amazing sheen when in the right light. She requires an almost constant supply of water, so you need to wet her sponge four or five times a day. She loves to sit on the damp sponge, so you will have to find a way to remove her from it before dousing it. If you're still hesitant on the tarantula, I have several archeological artifacts that I found while near Cholula in Puebla, Mexico. They are nearly priceless, but these Yu-Gi-Oh cards are far too tantalizing to pass up, and I have no desire to sell the artifacts myself. They have been appraised at almost $700. I have pictures.
William
From: Jim Yourke
To: William Manning
Date: Tue, Jun 16, 2009 at 5:17 PM
Subject: Re: Yu-Gi-Oh Cards
wut do u know about it
From: William Manning
To: Jim Yourke
Date: Tue, Jun 16, 2009 at 5:31 PM
Subject: Re: Yu-Gi-Oh Cards
Well, I'm no archaeologist, but my friend Craig who took me on the excavation is the stepson of a Mesoamerican anthropologist. He assured me it was legitimate. We pulled it from the remains of an ancient burial area, dated to appox. 1100AD. The symbols on the second complete row reportedly translate to either "arrow" or "insect." Craig even wrote a note of authentication that goes with the artifact!
From: Jim Yourke
To: William Manning
Date: Tue, Jun 16, 2009 at 5:35 PM
Subject: Re: Yu-Gi-Oh Cards
Well I will take the rock and the marmot if u want .
From: William Manning
To: Jim Yourke
Date: Tue, Jun 16, 2009 at 5:51 PM
Subject: Re: Yu-Gi-Oh Cards
Jim, I offered the artifact and the marmot separately for a reason. Call me superstitious, but because the "rock" was found near a burial mound, I feel that it is imbibed with some sort of supernatural force. My marmot, Steve, will NOT, under any circumstances, go near the rock. He is absolutely terrified of the thing. I attempted to put them in the same room, and Steve simply scurried into a corner and cowered for well over an hour until I moved the rock. You will need to make a decision between the two, or else offer something in addition to the Yu-Gi-Oh cards. I'm sure you can understand.
William
From: Jim Yourke
To: William Manning
Date: Tue, Jun 16, 2009 at 6:51 PM
Subject: Re: Yu-Gi-Oh Cards
Ok then where r u coming from?? And do u have a pic of the marmot ?? And when can u come drop them off
From: William Manning
To: Jim Yourke
Date: Tue, Jun 16, 2009 at 7:04 PM
Subject: Re: Yu-Gi-Oh Cards
I live on 162nd on the east side. I can drop them off any time after Friday. I am taking Steve to the veterinarian Friday morning to get a prescription for several ailments. Steve has worms, so you will have to watch his bottom and make sure there are not too many worms dropping on your floor. I believe he also has ocular loiasis, so he will need to take Ivermectin pills three or four times a day. The bill should be no more than $800, so you can just pay me in cash when I drop Steve off.
From: Jim Yourke
To: William Manning
Date: Tue, Jun 16, 2009 at 7:42 PM
Subject: Re: Yu-Gi-Oh Cards
Well u should of had him healthy and fit and not try to pass off a sick animal for some cards.and for some more info my family is full of veterinarians so all my animal are good and healthy. and the first sign of sickness I take them to my uncle I don't have to wait and make them suffer until friday like some people. So u can bring the marmot if u want and I will take care of him or offer me some thing else .
From: William Manning
To: Jim Yourke
Date: Tue, Jun 16, 2009 at 7:48 PM
Subject: Re: Yu-Gi-Oh Cards
I love Steve very much. I am not trying to "pass off" a sick animal. I just really need these cards to boost my collection! I will call Steve's vet and cancel the appointment right now. I'm sorry if you have gotten the idea that I do not like my marmot. I'm sure your uncle will take great care of him. I will need to know where to drop Steve and my artifact off. Several friends of mine will be coming along to say goodbye to Steve, and to put their final blessings on the Aztec rock. This shouldn't be a problem at all.
From: Jim Yourke
To: William Manning
Date: Tue, Jun 16, 2009 at 7:56 PM
Subject: Re: Yu-Gi-Oh Cards
No that's fine I am nyc police officer u can drop it off 47th precinct in the bronx
From: William Manning
To: Jim Yourke
Date: Tue, Jun 16, 2009 at 8:00 PM
Subject: Re: Yu-Gi-Oh Cards
Okay! So where should my friends have this goodbye party?
From: Jim Yourke
To: William Manning
Date: Tue, Jun 16, 2009 at 8:04 PM
Subject: Re: Yu-Gi-Oh Cards
What party??? U drop him off say your good byes and off u go...
From: William Manning
To: Jim Yourke
Date: Tue, Jun 16, 2009 at 8:08 PM
Subject: Re: Yu-Gi-Oh Cards
Yes, that's what I'm saying. I mean, we can call it a shindig if you want--it's doesn't HAVE to be a "party." I've told Charlie and Gina to bring punch, while Adrian's going to hang streamers. Is there any decent place to hang streamers at the 47th precinct? I'm not sure how many more people are coming, but I believe Adrian invited his lab partner, and maybe his lady friend. We'll just walk over there. You should bring some hats or maybe balloons. Steve would love that!
From: Jim Yourke
To: William Manning
Date: Tue, Jun 16, 2009 at 8:26 PM
Subject: Re: Yu-Gi-Oh Cards
U sed u lived 162st now u are in walking distance of the 47th precinct. I don't know what u are up to and I don't care . Bring the marmot and the rock on sunday and if u waste my time or if the rock is something u made with a marker I am going to lock u and your friends up.. Ps there is going to be no party.
From: William Manning
To: Jim Yourke
Date: Tue, Jun 16, 2009 at 8:41 PM
Subject: Re: Yu-Gi-Oh Cards
I'm sorry, I forgot that you requested that I not call it a "party." I meant shindig. I talked to Adrian, and he is bringing his lab partner. I don't know her, so I cannot speak to her character, but I'm sure anybody Adrian likes will be all right. I will see you on Sunday, but I don't know how I will recognize you. Can you wear a hat or something? Also, don't forget the balloons.
From: Jim Yourke
To: William Manning
Date: Tue, Jun 16, 2009 at 8:45 PM
Subject: Re: Yu-Gi-Oh Cards
Your a stupid f**k
From: William Manning
To: Jim Yourke
Date: Tue, Jun 16, 2009 at 8:48 PM
Subject: Re: Yu-Gi-Oh Cards
I hope you can give me a second chance. I'm sure that once you meet me on Sunday, you will like me. Not to mention that the marmot will completely win your heart.
PS. "You're"
From: Jim Yourke
To: William Manning
Date: Tue, Jun 16, 2009 at 8:50 PM
Subject: Re: Yu-Gi-Oh Cards
You were trying to rob me and I would have shot u think about that...
From: William Manning
To: Jim Yourke
Date: Tue, Jun 16, 2009 at 8:53 PM
Subject: Re: Yu-Gi-Oh Cards
But you would lose your badge! I wouldn't want you to lose your job because of some Yu-Gi-Oh cards!
From: Jim Yourke
To: William Manning
Date: Tue, Jun 16, 2009 at 8:56 PM
Subject: Re: Yu-Gi-Oh Cards
I can see your a dum f**k stop writing me u p***y
From: William Manning
To: Jim Yourke
Date: Tue, Jun 16, 2009 at 9:01 PM
Subject: Re: Yu-Gi-Oh Cards
Okay.
From: Jim Yourke
To: William Manning
Date: Tue, Jun 16, 2009 at 9:04 PM
Subject: Re: Yu-Gi-Oh Cards
And how long did it take u to draw the pictures on the rock.
Ps stop playing yugioh and grow up
From: William Manning
To: Jim Yourke
Date: Tue, Jun 16, 2009 at 9:09 PM
Subject: Re: Yu-Gi-Oh Cards
What?! You're insinuating that the rock is fake? I think I would have recognized marker on a rock as soon as I dug it from the ancient Mexican soil. Just because you cannot recognize history when you see it, doesn't mean the rest of us can't appreciate it! Also, if I stop playing Yu-Gi-Oh, I will lose almost all street cred! Surely a cop such as yourself can see the importance of street cred in a neighborhood such as this
From: Jim Yourke
To: William Manning
Date: Tue, Jun 16, 2009 at 9:17 PM
Subject: Re: Yu-Gi-Oh Cards
What 162st or 229st u never left ny in your life. That's y u were giving me that rare rock for some yugiho cards man grow up street cred u must be like 16 and no more than 18 farts old. Just stay in school and say no to drugs u little fag
From: William Manning
To: Jim Yourke
Date: Tue, Jun 16, 2009 at 9:21 PM
Subject: Re: Yu-Gi-Oh Cards
I feel that what you are saying is rather supercilious. Your pompousness and inconsistencies in your story have led me to believe that you never had any cards to begin with. I can't believe you'd put a completely fake ad up just trying to lure innocent people in, so that you may harass them endlessly. I say shame, my good sir. Shame. You have sure taken me for a ride.
From: Jim Yourke
To: William Manning
Date: Tue, Jun 16, 2009 at 9:28 PM
Subject: Re: Yu-Gi-Oh Cards
Lol I can not put it better words that's what are doing to me but I will add u were trying to meet me some where with your friends and rob me but before that you were trying to scam me out of $$800 for a vet bill for some sick rat. are u crazy
From: William Manning
To: Jim Yourke
Date: Tue, Jun 16, 2009 at 9:35 PM
Subject: Re: Yu-Gi-Oh Cards
So no shindig?
0 comments:
Post a Comment